shopping online: observations

I read an item on the Usability Sciences site: Shipping Options positively impact Retail Websites which attempts to explain why so few people (7%, in their study) who enter a website make purchases. I'm not sure they got it right.

To be sure, there are many cases where I (virtually) wandered around an online store and didn't buy anything. There are other times where I've bought something and never returned (example: Uneetee's low-quality T-shirts). I suspect one thing online merchants aren't considering is how easy it is to compare vendors while online. This is something that's much harder in the B&M world, absent an army of friends with cellphones shopping for the same item simultaneously.

A friend of mine explained The Secret of Retail to me this way: If you don't have it, get it. If you do have it, sell it (quickly). Unwritten: if you can't sell it, get rid of it and make way for something that will sell. All sounds simple, but it's not -- consumers are fickle.

I've often browsed an online store and found something I like. My next step is to open a new browser tab to compare bottom-line prices (shipping plus sales tax). Some shopping bots make this easier than others (I continue to admire the simplicity of the "Total price" column on shopper.cnet.com); the savings can be significant. Nor do I always buy from the lowest-price vendor: a low rating will send me scurrying away, while a seller in a nearby state may get my business versus one at either coast (shipping times). Frequently, I will wait for The Exact Model to be in stock.

Once I'm convinced the merchant is reputable and the final price is acceptable, I make my purchase and abandon the e-shopping cart in the other browser tab. I'm then nothing more than a Lost Business Statistic, since there's no analysis of why I didn't buy (odds are high that I wouldn't take the time to explain myself - life is too short). The online merchant is left bewildered (often "clueless"), but no more so than most B&Ms (absent the rare occasion where a clerk asks "did you find everything you want?" -- and really meant it).

One of the most egregious examples of this has to be Amazon Marketplace (the "used and new" merchant selector). Example: given a random shopping cart full of ten books I'm left to attempt combining - manually - my orders so as to minimize the default impact of paying ten shipping charges to ten different vendors. What would be Real Sweet (are you listening, Geoff?) is if I could automagically find a bottom-line price for all books in my cart. IMHO, Amazon Marketplace got it backwards - I'm left to choose the vendor first, then the product. Honestly, I seldom care who's selling to me, as long as they meet my reliability specs.

True, some books may be a dollar more here than there, but this is offset by a reduction in total shipping charges, and presumably fewer parcels en route to me. I would much rather get one box than ten, scattered across 5 days. There's a market out there for an aggregator for Amazon Marketplace, to fix this problem.

Bottom line? I suspect what I'm seeking is some sort of [x]Minimize Vendors button which would give me no more than 3 options:

$100 gets 5 books from Vendor A, 3 from vendor B and 2 from vendor C;
$110 gets 8 books from Vendor D and 2 from Vendor B;
$120 gets all 10 books from an aggregator.

Unspoken Fourth Option:

$140 gets 10 books from 10 vendors (the Amazon Marketplace default)

Granted there is a lot of work to be done here, since the quality of those Used Pre-owned Books may vary wildly by vendor, depending on inventory - yes, I understand that. Would (m)any people other than me find this useful? Unknown. For many years, I have used an e-merchant's Wish List to hold books or CDs for which I didn't want immediate gratification. In some cases, I'm waiting for the price to fall (why pay $75 for a new book when I might find a used one for $25 in 2 months' time?) while in other cases I'm simply trying to minimize the total shipping costs.

Anecdotally, I've noticed that shipments to me via FedEx has become erratic in the past few months; their predicted arrival date is often off by two days or more, while UPS has been spot-on. Is this a trend?

USAA - attaboy!

It's not often that you read Good Things about an insurance company, but .. golly gee whiz .. I'm quite happy with mine.

You may recall that I was sideswiped last month, the very day Addison was holding its Kaboom Town celebration (July 3, for those of you who track such things). Although our schedules didn't initially mesh, I finally got a call from my claims adjuster - on a Saturday afternoon - and after describing what happened, she offered to use the Uninsured Motorist deductible ($250) versus my Comprehensive deductible ($1000). She was even so nice as to wire transfer the $750 difference into my checking account.

Woo hoo! I think I'll spend this windfall by adding more insulation to my attic. Oh wait, I already did that. Maybe I'll have my trees trimmed (required every 4 years)? Oh wait, I already did that, too. Hmmm .. maybe I'll treat myself to a Sno-Kone™?

Kudos to USAA (insurance and other Financial Stuff) - above and beyond the call.

fun! with spam

Spammers must be, on average, even more stupid than the average Republican Party Lackey.

Today, while sipping my morning coffee, I took a (very) few minutes to look at one email account which has become a spam trap. I originally used this account only for a job search, so all the spam came as the result of my resume being Out There. Since I'm not currently in the job market, this account serves no other function. In the past 4 days, it attracted 182 emails; all were trapped by the spam filter (my settings are to relegate anyone not in my Address Book as a spammer).

Of the 182 messages, I looked only at the Subject lines for a breakdown:

43 - sex      (either "make me a stud" or "viagra spelled N different ways")
38 - health   (mostly innocent stuff like "want to be healthy?")
37 - nebulous (random words)
30 - cheap medicine
24 - credit   (most say TransUnion; Experian; Equifax or FICO)
 7 - name     (my name is in the Subject: line)
 3 - get rich quick

It's worth noting that I didn't read the body text of ANY of these. People who want to reach me are in my Address Book. Even if someone acquires that list, odds are very high that the spam filters will trap the message due to content alone. Legitimate senders may have to resort to a phone call to advise me that an email is en route, but resending is trivial (for all but AOL newbies).

Memos to spammers:

1-Your messages are not reaching me.

2-You are throwing your money away - the only one making any money is the guy who sold you the list. By the way, 98% of the addresses have been abandoned due to excess spam, anyway. You're paying good money for a list which contains only 2% live addresses, and I'd guess that 90% of that 2% (get our your calculator - if you can operate one) will be trapped by spam filters. Your odds at even getting anyone to read your message - much less respond - is starting to look very, very remote. Then again, you never were any good at math.

3-You'd be better off playing the lottery -- which is for other people who Can't Do Math, either.

4-You'd do much better putting the money you're paying for the spam list into a savings account at 2%, but since you didn't pay attention in school, I don't expect any of you inbreds to understand this.

Spam™ (the capitalized one) is probably a trademark of Hormel Foods, who produce fine meat products. No harm intended, guys.

another sharp poke in the bum

I'm not sure if JB believed me when I said something about the experiments using Food as a Vaccine Vehicle. Instead of "bend over and drop your pants" the doctor could say "take this with a glass of water". Perhaps the sadistic side of the medical profession enjoys poking me in the butt(ocks) with a sharp object, so I doubt this oral vaccination test is much more than a fad.

Speaking of sharp pokes in the bum, I see that today's the day that Texans are allowed to get a free copy of our credit report. The official site is AnnualCreditReport.com but I suspect many Unsuspecting Souls will be led to one of the many soundalike sites such as FreeCreditReport.com (owned by Experian); Free-CreditCheck.com (owned by TransUnion); MyCreditReport.com (probably owned by some guy in New Jersey named Guido), and so forth .. all of whom will try to sell you something.

An article in the DMN said one of the shortcomings of the law is that you can't get your Credit Score (FICO® = Fair Isaac Corporation) free. A small amount of A9'ing explained that FICO scores range from 300-850, and anything below 500 spells T-R-O-U-B-L-E. I have no earthly clue what my FICO is, although Equifax offered to sell me my FICO® credit score for $6.95!

I chose Equifax at random, mostly. They're alphabetically first, so maybe it'll be easier for me to remember if I want another free report (from either Experian or TransUnion) later this year. Equifax was sweet enough to offer (for free) my Equifax Credit Rankings™ ("a $7.95 value!"). They cautioned: "Once you click [submit], you will not be able to reorder your free annual credit report from Equifax for one year" (but that doesn't mean I can't order a free one from Experian in 4 months, and one from TransUnion 4 months after that, ad infinitum).

Nicely, this was instantly available online, with the caution: "This Equifax Credit Report™ is available for you to view until 07/01/2005". Wow .. this gives me 30 days to peruse. Since mine printed to 18 pages long, it'll take me at least 30 days to decipher it anyhoo.

it ain't free until the fat lady sings ...

I suspect I have more than one book with a remainder mark, and didn't know it. Some used books are sold online with this note: "may have a remainder mark". Huh? I BrainBoost'ed and found The Explanation. I reckon I'd never notice one unless I went a'huntin for it.

Free Credit Report!       (DOT COM)

My advice to anyone looking for their Free Credit Report is: caveat emptor (that's Latin for "hang onto yer wallet").

Yes, you can get your one free credit report per year (as mandated by the FCRA) .. I did it yesterday. But, it's easy to find yourself being billed $100+/year -- by the same consumer reporting agency that gave you the free report. If the website asks for your credit card number, be prepared to Just Say No.

I did the FreeCreditReport.com thing (really Experian). They offered to show me TransUnion and EquiFax's "free" credit reports, too .. then (at the end of 30 days) bill me $12.95/month for the rest of my natural life. Thanks, no. Also (for an additional $5) they offered to show me my Credit Score. Thanks, no.

There are warnings about FreeCreditReport.com on RipOffReport.com. Most concern those recurring monthly charges, which are difficult to stop. This isn't the first time I've heard of a business which takes your credit card number, then "has trouble" stopping the gravy train.

I have my (8-page) report in hand; there were no real errors (just a few prehistoric accounts which have been closed for years). I last looked at this stuff 10 years ago, I think .. and it had much more outdated info then. I wrote to the companies, asking them to remove that old stuff: looks like they did.

Finally, out of idle curiosity I went to Sears' website to see if there'd been a price drop on My New Friend (the dishwasher). No! The New "sale price" is almost $100 more than I paid on November 13th. Guess I won't be asking for their low price guarantee, eh.