divine retribution

Okay, I'm confused.

Everybody Knows (™ Fox "News") that Hurricane Katrina was divine retribution for a 2005 gay pride parade in New Orleans. And that Hurricane Gustav was divine retribution for the same parade (Southern Decadence) in 2008.

So what is Hurricane Ike divine retribution for -- Sarah Palin's nomination? Dubya's Presidency (since the target this time was Dubya's Oil Buddies)?

I'm just looking for the correct someone/something to blame.

Republicans using tactics #5, #8 and #10 today

Republican Campaign Tactics:

1. Never, EVER take responsibility.
2. Always blame the Democrats - for everything.
3. Lie, then lie some more. Everybody Knows™ that if you repeat something 3 times, it becomes True! You may even start believing the lies yourself.
4. Learn how to speak out of both sides of your mouth, without flinching. Develop a negative twist to everything your opponent does, even if it's just walking across the street.
5. Trivialize everything your opponent says. Take a seemingly-insignificant phrase out of context (such as "lipstick on a pig"), and tell your audience that was the primary message. Say it with a sneer, if possible.
6. If you're an elected Republic, learn how to obfuscate and delay - those are GOP SOP (2007-8 Republic senators have filibustered more bills than any Congress in history)
7. Never forget that most voters do not follow politics, so pander to them, always. You are there to get their vote, not educate them.
8. Distract the voters! When they ask about the economy, or the war, or health care, ask them why they're not wearing an American flag lapel pin, or why they hate America.
9. Never admit you're wrong; that is a sign of weakness.
10. Feign outrage - often.

As I explained to LWB:

One thing you have to understand about Republicans in general : they are simple people. They want easy, simple answers to life's problems and get confused whenever the answer is even mildly complex. If you try to argue with them, they'll become frustrated and angry, because they've already concluded that the simplest answer is the most logical.

I've found it easier to talk to them if I pretend i'm talking to an 8-year old, and explain things in very simple ways. Many of them made it through school either because their rich parents asked paid for favors, or the problem with education in general -- where there's significant pressure to pass students because it's just easier than dealing with them another year.

Have you noticed how few Texans can read/write without making frequent spelling and grammar errors? Their priorities are all wrong; they put more emphasis on the weekly football game, or how the cheerleader's hair looks, than education. There are exceptions, of course; those are called "Democrats".

It would be funny if it weren't so serious. Republicans vote like they're selecting a next-door neighbor. Democrats vote like they're selecting someone for a JOB - as US President, in this case.

Originally posted on 8 July 2008

Although intended to be funny, I found this disturbingly true

On 236.com: Dear Republicans, the People Who Control Your Party Think You're Dumb

The Stupid Vortex

It seriously offends me that the average American voter makes choices based not on job qualifications, but on who would make a better next-door neighbor.

They* just admitted that "This election is not about issues." Out loud. They actually said that. And few people blinked.

* McCain campaign manager Rick Davis

I still think mandatory voter education classes Just Have To happen, if we're to ever dig ourselves out of The Stupid Vortex. Without a minimum passing score, the person doesn't get to vote. Naturally, I'll be the one to design the test.

The framing that the GOP is trying to achieve now regarding their party's message is quite unbelievable, and will undoubtedly be soaked up by a measurable percentage of the voter pool. That is more than sad; it is criminal.

For the rest of us whose brain cells have yet to be compromised, may I suggest an immediate re-read of George Lakoff's splendid book, Don't Think of an Elephant! .. or watch any of the classic propaganda films (The Birth of a Nation; any highlight reel of a Republic Party convention; Triumph of the Will; etc.).

He who controls the past, controls the future.

In 2006, a questionnaire was sent to all candidates for the gubernatorial race in Alaska. Although many of Sarah Palin's answers brand her a typical Republican, her answer to number 11:

Are you offended by the phrase "Under God" in the Pledge of Allegiance? Why or why not?

made me Laugh Out Loud. Sarah Palin answered:

"Not on your life. If it was good enough for the founding fathers, its good enough for me and I’ll fight in defense of our Pledge of Allegiance."

While I'm sure the small-brained ones (Republic Party) will clasp their hands and offer praise (ignoring Palin's incorrect punctuation, and threat of violence), those of us who studied American History in a classroom (i.e. not home-schooled) know that "Under God" was added as a knee-jerk reaction to the Commie Witch Hunts of the early 1950s, and became law on Flag Day 1954. Shocking reality: that's long after the last Founding Father was Dead And Buried. Somehow America did just fine without the religious phrase for nearly 180 years.

Future home-schooled generations will never know this; their parents will shirley keep them ignert [sic, sic]. Palin's bio on Wikipedia ("the Unquestioned Fount of All Knowledge") doesn't mention anything prior to high school, so I don't know if she attended public schools or was edjicated by her parunts .. out behind the barn.

Conclusion: The novel [Nineteen Eighty-Four] (prophetically written in 1949) is rapidly becoming less Fiction every day. Edward R. Murrow - who surely read the book - must be rolling in his grave.

Unrelated: I read that 17 year-old Bristol Palin is pregnant. I'm left to wonder why "abstinence only" didn't work for the Palins? Sounds like parental failure to me. Then again, Bristol's repeating the mistake her own parents made (the Palin's oldest son was born 7 months after her parents "eloped").

poor choice of words

I had to laugh when I read the headline for Peter Baker's column in today's New York Times: Choice of Palin Is a Bold Move by McCain, With Risks.

Now, I don't blame Peter because he didn't use the word "bold" in the article; thus, the error was induced by one of the editors.

You see, the correct term to use is not bold, but reckless. Contemptible, perhaps. John Sidney McCain has sunk so low in his quest for power that he's willing to risk America to the likes of a FAR right-wing female, whose claim to fame is that she looks like the proverbial "naughty librarian" of porn star fame. I suspect Reckless John thinks he'll snag some disaffected Hillary voters.

The only amusing part of this whole charade was watching Reckless John trying to sneak a peek at Palin's tits when he stood alongside her in Dayton. Maybe he was fantasizing about Wife 3.0 (Cindy has surely bitch-slapped him by now)

We don't deserve this. If, by some perverted fluke of fate, Reckless John were to be elected in November, followed by his inevitable death a few months later, we'd be left with this IDiot who denies global warming, evolution, and even the right of the Alaskan polar bears to survive.

It's not all Reckless John's fault, mind you. If Sarah Palin had an ounce of pride for her country, she would have (politely, of course) told McCain NO when he asked her to be his running mate. She knows she's unqualified, yet she (apparently) shares McCain's contempt for America, and said yes. Hell, there are sixteen (16) US cities with a larger population than Alaska .. why couldn't Reckless John pick one of their mayors instead?

While watching The Charade In Dayton, I had a flashback to 1988 when King George I introduced Dan Quayle as his running mate. I'll be the first to acknowledge that my first impression of J. Danforth was completely off the mark; I suspected Quayle would be a good choice and it wasn't until later that the extent of his buffoonery became apparent (his stupidity is legendary).

In about 65 days, I'm hoping this will fade away to just a bad memory. With far better access to archival information now, and The Blogosphere (not to mention The Daily Show), I suspect the extent of Sarah Palin's inner self will quickly become obvious. The Republic Party fully deserves the landslide it's about to face.

is this what they mean by a "Hail Sarah" ?

The First Big Test for the POTUS nominees is often their choice of running mate.

Barack Obama chose a sane, seasoned foreign policy guru.

John McCain chose an ex-beauty queen who was part-time mayor of an Alaskan village two years ago. And she could have her pretty little French Nails on the "nucular trigger" when John McCain dies early next year.

Rumor has it that even Dan Quayle and Geraldine Ferraro are baffled.

I'm guessing John Sidney McCain watched Obama's speech in Denver and threw Tim Pawlenty under the bus at the Very Last Second.

Worth noting:
The population of Alaska was 663,661 (2005).
Even Collin County, Texas (Plano, etc) is larger - at 748,050.
The population of Dallas (city) is 1,300,350 .. about double that of ALL of Alaska.

the faces of evil

A week ago, religious cult leader Rick Warren asked Obama and McCain about evil; wisely, they both acknowledged that it exists (wow! how controversial! what a lame question!).

Today, there are various Faces Of Evil:

---

# 1 - meth head assassins

I wonder if these White Christian Republicans [Tharin Robert Gartrell, 28; Nathan Johnson, 32; and Shawn Adolf, 33] knew they'd be famous more than 48 hours ahead of the time they planned to assassinate Senator Obama? I wonder how long it'll be before Gartrell and his gang are linked to Karl Christian Rove, and whether he financed them?

---

# 2 - swiftboat bigots


They may also wish to look for financial links from alleged white supremacist misunderstood tycoon Harold C. Simmons, who lives here in Dallas.

Simmons is the billionaire scumbag Texas sweetheart who's financing this year's swiftboat ad about Barack Obama. He has practice; he did the same thing to John Kerry in 2004 which is why we got Four More Years of George W. Bush.

At least Simmons is following Republic Golden Rule #3: Lie, then lie some more. He understands that the small-minded fools who make up the base of the Republic Party will believe most anything.

---

# 3 - Karl Christian Rove (and his co-conspirators at Fox "News")



I look forward to the day when the US version of The Nuremberg Trials are held, with these defendants getting the same fate as the Nazi leaders.

If we still had The Fairness Doctrine, they'd all be off the air by now.

John McCain: "a noun, a verb, and P.O.W."

I think I'm gonna like what Joe Biden adds to The Race, especially if he makes a slight modification to his comment that sunk Rudy Giuliani's campaign:



Related: Maureen Dowd's column: Too Much of a Bad Thing

Also, a quick comment about how John Sidney McCain doesn't know how many houses he owns: well, duh. Most of them are million-dollar condos that (2nd) wife Cindy bought; he's probably never even been in half of them.

Just like Cindy bought John McCain himself; she wanted a Trophy Husband (think: airhead) and that's what she got. As I've told people over-and-over-and-over: FOLLOW THE MONEY.

The one who pulls John McCain's strings is his chief financial backer: CINDY. That's what makes this a must-read article: Made Man - How Cindy Hensley invented John McCain, even if it is on the long side.

Republic Party Credo, pre-convention update

It appears the Republic Party Credo missed two items .. so, numbers 8 and 9 have been added:

1. Never, EVER take responsibility.
2. Always blame the Democrats - for everything.
3. Lie, then lie some more. Everybody Knows™ that if you repeat something 3 times, it becomes True! You may even start believing the lies yourself.
4. Learn how to speak out of both sides of your mouth, without flinching. Develop a negative twist to everything your opponent does, even if it's just walking across the street.
5. Trivialize everything your opponent says. Take a seemingly-insignificant phrase out of context, and tell your audience that was the primary message. Say it with a sneer, if possible.
6. If you're an elected Republic, learn how to obfuscate and delay - those are GOP SOP (2007-8 Republic senators have filibustered more bills than any Congress in history)
7. Never forget that most voters do not follow politics, so pander to them, always. You are there to get their vote, not educate them.
8. Distract the voters! When they ask about the economy, or the war, or health care, ask them why they're not wearing an American flag lapel pin, or why they hate America.
9. Never admit you're wrong; that is a sign of weakness.

As I explained to LWB:

One thing you have to understand about Republicans in general : they are simple people. They want easy, simple answers to life's problems and get confused whenever the answer is even mildly complex. If you try to argue with them, they'll become frustrated and angry, because they've already concluded that the simple answer is logical.

I've found it easier to talk to them if I pretend i'm talking to an 8-year old, and explain things in very simple ways. Many of them made it through school either because their rich parents asked for favors, or .. just the problem with education in general where there's significant pressure to pass students.

Haven't you noticed how few Texans can read/write without making frequent spelling and grammar errors? Their priorities are all wrong; they put more emphasis on the weekly football game, or how the cheerleader's hair looks, than education. There are exceptions, of course; those are called "Democrats".

It would be funny if it weren't so serious. Republicans vote like they're selecting a next-door neighbor. Democrats vote like they're selecting someone for a JOB - as US President, in this case.

Originally posted on 8 July 2008

fun with charts and graphs

h/t to Geoff ...

guilt-free in Arkansas

One thing that will probably not come out in the story about Timothy Dale Johnson (the Arkansas man who assassinated* Democratic super delegate Bill Gwatney (Arkansas Democratic Chairman)) earlier today:

What radio station was he listening to (in his blue pickup)?

I'd bet dollars-to-doughnuts that it was Ann Coulter, commanding him (and anyone else who would listen) to murder as many "Libbberals" as possible. The fact that he didn't use Coulter's designated implement - the baseball bat - is mostly irrelevant. Why he chose not to murder a security guard at the Arkansas Baptist State Convention office (a few minutes after Gwatney's assassination) remains a mystery.

Oddly, had he not threatened that security guard, he might have gotten away with the crime. That worker provided the man's vehicle description, as documented on The Arkansas Times' blog.

This comes just over two weeks after another Coulter disciple, Jim David Adkisson, murdered two (and wounded seven) people at Tennessee Valley Unitarian Universalist Church in Knoxville, which was known for daring to be inclusive/tolerant - something that Coulter (and her millionaire accomplices - Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly, etc) - find abhorrent.

As I understand it, Johnson was fired from his job after he wrote graffiti on a wall at the Target grocery in Conway, Arkansas. He went home, loaded his guns and proceeded to find the state's top Democrat and assassinate him. Ann Coulter must be very, very proud of her henchman.

* The fact that he asked for Gwatney by name makes this an assassination.

Friday update: looks like there are others advocating the killing of Democrats: The Right Shirts.com

history repeats itself ?

While watching the news of Russia's invasion of Georgia, I can't help but be reminded of the German invasion of Poland in 1939, which started World War II.

Both started with fabricated "reasons" for the invasion, with both resulting in the capture of the (formerly) sovereign nation. Yes, I know Putin hasn't completed the capture of the Georgian capital yet - that's only a matter of time.

What am I missing with this parallel?

Tuesday update: McCain is "too dangerous and unstable to be president", says Josh Marshall.

Hi, I'm Pete Sessions and I'm your moron

"Ignorance can be cured through education, but there is no cure for stupid."
- anonymous

For the past several days, I've been targeted by a thinly-veiled "auto-dialer to re-elect Pete Sessions" -- in theory, he's my US Congressman. In truth, he's just another Republic Party Moron, who only reaches out to us constituents when it's election time.

This one was a fairly typical Republic survey (lasting about three (3) minutes) where they ask loaded questions designed to pander to the Republic Party base. Only yes or no answers are accepted - so if you'd like to reply "maybe" or "it depends" then you're out of luck. In this one, he repeats "Pete Sessions, your congressman" at least 4 times. I suspect that's because surveys show he has virtually no name recognition, and does nothing other than vote the way his Republic Party leaders order him. Pete Sessions is incapable/unwilling to think for himself.

Sessions' claim to fame is that he's the one responsible for gerrymandering the district and taking away our real Congressman, Martin Frost, in a Karl Rove-inspired slander campaign. Since then, we've been without real representation.

The twist on this call is that it was recorded by the candidate, so it was almost like (golly!) he was talking to me. Of course, in real life that doesn't happen.

Two of the questions concerned nuclear energy, which Pete Sessions calls "NUCULAR" (just like his bootlicker, George Dubya Bush). One of my first insights into whether a person has an IQ above 100 is their ability to pronounce the word NUCLEAR and .. no surprise .. Sessions fails that test.

I've blogged about this before, but it bears repeating: my two US senators (Hutchison and Cornyn) and my US congressman (Sessions) are all Bush-licking Republics, which means that I have no representation. All three of these clowns are there to support Big Oil and other large donors, and couldn't care less about the people who live here, except in the few weeks preceding any election where they use their franking (free mail) and auto-dialers to give the illusion that they're doing something.

Sadly, most Texan voters are poorly educated and will re-elect these clowns year after year (none of the three have any discernable skills, other than pandering).

McCain - now synonymous with LIAR

(click for larger image, suitable for framing)

Kudos to despair.com, naturally.

Britney and Paris! Britney and Paris!

How bad does John McCain want to avoid talking about real issues? He's running ads with Britney and Paris.

Is that what Americans are concerned about? Britney and Paris?

Do you want to know how we are going to right the ship of our economy? Or do you want to hear about Britney and Paris?

Want to talk about how we are going to extract our troops from Iraq? Or do you want to hear about Britney and Paris?

---

(no, I didn't write this .. kudos to Talking Points Memo)

Update: Ed Cognoski agrees, in this scathing blog: Race and politics

Why did the Obama cross the road?

ah, politics.

A couple of us were talking about John SIDNEY McCain's latest slimeball All-Negative-All-The-Time Campaign tactics, and it was noted that they've decided to spin anything/everything that their challenger does into evil, no matter how pithy.

So, if Barack Obama crossed the street ..

.. on foot, they'd attack him for not using mass transit (thus pandering to the transit lobby);

.. in a bus, they'd attack him for trying to appease "blue collar workers";

.. in a Prius, they'd attack him for not using a Detroit-built automobile (pandering to the US auto industry);

.. in a Ford, they'd attack him for being "anti-General Motors";

.. in a GMC, they'd attack him for being "anti-Ford";

.. on a skateboard, they'd attack him for being a Liberal Elitist (conservatives can't ride skateboards)

You get the idea.

---

Friday update: my suspicions are confirmed.

John McCain: LIAR!

I don't know if John McCain's staff has been talking to Hillary about how effective her "sniper fire story" was, but .. they're going into a tailspin and might as well cancel their convention and save us all a lot of money and trouble.

McCain's early promises of running a positive campaign are now at the bottom of the outhouse .. perhaps his latest wife Cindy is down there among all the feces, swimming in it like so much Evian in her billion dollar bathtub.


The latest SERIES of lies is coming from Karl Rove, saying that Barack Obama wouldn't visit our troops in Germany unless he could be assured of a photo op. What a crock of pig swill ... the good news is that this is being debunked all over the web, with McCain himself starting to look like The Fool.

At least they have a different kind of contempt for our veterans than Dick Cheney.

It's kind of sad. Sure, he's basically a hateful old man who has a lot of trouble remembering anything (much less taking responsibility), but you'd think he'd at least do The Honorable Thing and not resort to blatant lies, still 3+ months from the election. So much for the Straight Talk Express - it's become increasingly obvious that Arianna Huffington was dead on target with her book, detailing how Maverick John McCain - the Vietnam war hero - has ceased to exist.

Let's get this election over with and move on.

humor, defined

Not Funny	Hysterical

queue the preachers!

News item:

HOUSTON (Reuters) - Tropical Storm Dolly churned toward southern Texas on Monday, and forecasters said they expected it to grow into a hurricane before hitting land near the Mexican border later this week.

Once it makes landfall, America's White Christian Preachers should immediately POUNCE, and tell everyone that the hurricane struck Texas because of its wickedness, for electing George Walker "Dubya" Bush as POTUS; Rick "Pretty Hair" Perry as Governor; Kay Bailey "Bootlicker Sr" Hutchison and John "Bootlicker Jr" Cornyn as US Senators.