Tuesday, March 6

The Final Solution

News item, 9am today:
The death count has jumped to more than 90 people killed in a suicide attack on Shiite pilgrims in Hillah.
Well, I'll bet that Ann (nee Andy) Coulter and the rest of the CFRP are So Very Pleased. They've told me that Bush's Army is Surging, and the streets of Baghdad are now safer. Why, prospective Starbucks franchisees are certainly lined up around the block. I'm reminded of the comment Laura ("Rocket Scientist") Bush made a few days ago:
"Many parts of Iraq are stable now. But, of course, what we see on television is that one bombing a day that discourages everybody."
Yeah, it's all the fault of those TV crews; if only we could stop the flow of information, all our problems would go away. I suppose Cheney and the rest of His war planners never thought the insurgents would simply resort to Whac-A-Mole™ tactics - attack elsewhere. Memo to Cheney: if you secure one place, the terraists will go elsewhere. It's like trying to contain Jell-O™ without the bowl.

Setting aside the trivial detail that we never should have attacked Iraq in the first place, I still think the best solution is simple:
Draft the children of anyone who voted for Bush in 2004. And that includes Jenna and Barbara.
That should provide more than enough bodies to police all of Iraq. President Quagmire did have a mandate then, right?

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