For those of you uncivilized city-dwellers who don't know the history behind the name "Dilly Bar", it's absurdly silly.
Plan A
Since it was still technically rush hour, we took "the back road" (partially) toward Van Alsytne, TX, where JB remembered seeing a Dairy Queen. Sure, there was one in Plano, but this destination - away from The Big City - offered a spirit of adventure, and a return to Simpler Times.
Needless to say, what we found was not quite what we expected:
the abandoned Dairy Queen in Van Alstyne, Texas. Our hearts sank. We pulled into the parking lot and just stared. In disbelief.
Some of you might say we should've checked the web first .. either Dairy Queen.com or the lesser-known DQTexas, Home of Texas Dairy Queens. In hindsight, that would've been a Real Good Idea. But, we both knew that every small town has at least one Dairy Queen. How else would small towns conduct their official business? In Texas, the mayor, city council, police chiefs, and other city staff gather with the ordinary citizens at Dairy Queen for breakfast.
Plan B
After we found the DQ in Van Alstyne closed, we decided to continue north on US-75, since there'd be another DQ in the next town. Well, that didn't happen. We got as far as Sherman, then Denison, then Durant. Up ahead, we could see the Red River and the promised land that is Oklahoma. It was time to turn around, and try some of the small towns, away from the freeway. That almost worked; we found another closed Dairy Queen, this one converted to "Queen Burger" (206 W Texas St) in Denison. Okay, that was the last straw.
Plan C
The goal now was to find most anything edible. JB suggested haute cuisine, in the form of the Snuffers location in McKinney, not far from where we started. Along the freeway exit, the GAS/FOOD/LODGING sign came into view. JB gasped for breath, and pointed. I was caught offguard, and didn't immediately understand that she had spotted .. The Holy Grail. On the roadsign were the two simple words: DAIRY QUEEN. Probably 10 miles from where we started. Oy, vey.
Exiting the freeway, we spotted the arrow directing us to The Destination. Just ahead on the right. A row of pickups were queued at the Drive-Thru. It was time to park, and go inside. To experience The Joy That Is Dairy Queen. JB wanted a soft serve cone, and she plucked a Dilly Bar from the freezer. We sat down to enjoy our find, and share a moment with Every Screaming Child In McKinney, who had come there to dine. It was nothing short of Fabulous.
on the left, the paper-bag version (made in the store). on the right, the plastic-encased version (made by child labor in Malaysia, no doubt).
Epilogue
Today, I ventured onto their website and found a DQ a weeee bit closer to home: like, uh, 4.2 miles away. Throwing caution to the wind, I drove over and bought Another Dilly Bar. This one was wrapped in a paper sack of sorts. It wasn't precision cast, like the plastic-encased one last night. But oh, the smooth, creamy goodness was all there. I even spotted a machine to make a Mister Misty, although it wasn't on the menu marquee. The only thing missing were the Squealing Rugrats.
3 comments:
Where was the one that was 4.2 miles away from you?
I managed the Van Alstyne DQ for over a year. I miss those days.
The first Dilly Bar was invented by the owner of a privately owned Diary Queen location in Leadington, Missouri in 1953. His name is Owen Sloan. He sold the idea to Diary Queen for $500 in 1955. Owen is currently 82 years old and in good health.
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